Dear Tech at RTL,
You have serious control issues. It always bugged me that you referred to my samples as your own and spoke as if you ran my project. In actuality, you have no idea the objectives of the study, the hypotheses tested, what the experiments were, what the analysis is or why the conclusions are important. That means it is NOT YOUR PROJECT.
You told me, and the PI of your lab, that it was impossible for me to go there and figure out your bench work. Fuck you. Despite your amazing organization (which completely rocks- someday I hope to use the mad skillz I learned from you in my own lab), you did not give me enough credit to understand the samples you ran or think critically about the problems, let alone fix them. Who the hell do you think you are? Is your bench work magic bench work that is run by elves and rainbows instead of reagents and machines? Instead, you told me that it would be better if I waited till you could return to the project (in January) and fix the errors since I wouldn't be able to do it. Seriously, what kind of person builds up a situation so that not only my data depends on you, but now also my graduation and paycheck come next semester?
I am soooo sick of playing nice with you in fear of my data being held hostage or messed up on purpose. Turns out- you messed it up anyway! Luckily, I have my data now, I got it myself and I don't need you or your petty little games anymore.
Flowers and sausages,
p.s. Your PI and I agreed over a year ago that your name isn't on any of these papers!